Trust
The x-ray experience completely changed my perspective. I learned that I could not trust doctors to honor what I want. This soon translated into the rest of my life. When someone asked me why I did something, I immediately assumed they were tying to keep me from getting what I want.
When I would go to the barber’s I would have to inspect my hair every two seconds to make sure they were giving me the cut I wanted. Soon, I began to not trust anyone or anything for anything. I expected an axe murderer every time I heard footsteps at night. Every barking dog was destined to bite me.
It wasn’t until I felt the need to come out of the closet that I started to trust people again. I needed to stop hiding, and to do that I had to trust people with my most personal truths. Trusting my best friend was an amazing experience. She and I have become closer as a result. I know this feeling is mutual, because she has since shared things just as personal, and possibly more so, with me.
Definitions
life is expanding
wings are unfolding
worlds are presenting themselves
learning to live without expectation
letting life be what it will
trying to stop needing labels
people are individuals
not just defined in groups
generalization breeds anger
attributing traits of some
to too many others
why think of people in groups
just let them be who they are
individuality defines
not common traits
what would the world be
if everyone were the same
why are differences frowned on
rather than being celebrated
why does the world think in two’s
life exists in spectrums
not just at the extremes
Happiness
writing from emotion
confusion consumes
acting feminine
assuredly male
angry at the world
it won’t accept
that we can define
our own kind of happiness Heroes
“They see us as superheroes”
THEY are my heroes
the ones younger than me,
younger than I was
who know more and fight harder
for what I want
what they want
The ones older than me
older not in time but in life
I pity them yet they should pity me
for they are stronger
stronger than I ever will or could be
strong enough to want to die, but stay
alive for the week or two
of heaven
where they can be free
and remind me why THEY
are my heroes
